Asking for a referral when you are shy

Asking a stranger for help can feel awkward, and many people put it off. The good news is that a referral request is a short written message. You can take your time over it, and the other person can answer when it suits them.

Make it smaller

• Aim for one message today, not ten. Small steps add up.
• Write the message first and leave it for an hour before you send it.
• Start with someone you already know a little, such as a former colleague or classmate.

Let the message do the work

You do not need to be chatty. Name the role, say in a line or two why you fit, and attach your CV. A clear, short message is easier to answer than a long, nervous one.

A very short template

Reframe the ask

• You are giving them a chance to help, and many employees are glad to, especially where their company pays a bonus.
• A no, or no reply, usually reflects how busy they are, not what they think of you.
• You can always ask someone else.

On Doorstep, the employee has already said they are open to requests for certain roles, and you get an answer with a reason, so there is less guessing.